..happy......new year!

este fim de ano está tão diferente do fim do ano passado..
quero dizer..
estou tão infeliz...
logo eu que sempre odiei tristeza e dramas
o mundo vai ficando distante
bem pequeno
como se nem existisse..só na minha imaginação
sempre fui vermelha..laranja..qq cor menos as frias
só o preto..que sempre amei..mas to falando da minha força de viver
por enquanto não vejo saída
pois não há nada nesse mundo
que possa me fazer feliz
nesse momento

por isso mantenho o silêncio
não faço perguntas
para as quais nem sei se haveriam respostas

mas lá no fundo
sinto uma raiva profunda

Not Every Pain Hurts
Lacrimosa

When you have the will
You learn to forgive and to forget
You have to -
Collect the broken pieces and humble hearted
Stand up from the place you hide
If i wouldn´t know to miss anything
It couldn´t hurt me no more
Mistakes tought to build life
from the ashes that fell down to ground

Without any pain it wouldn´t be the same
Experiences made me strong
Not every pain hurts
Deep inside
When you learn to devide
Don´t fear the danger
Follow your heart to the light
Live your dream and breath

When you listen to yourself
Don´t always expect
To find understanding
It takes time
You may loose your faith
But don´t be afraid to find the solution

That heavy wasn´t my load
That i wouldn´t also try
To carry yours
My burning heart - unbearable!
My optimistic mind - collapsed!

Without any pain it wouldn´t be the same
Experiences made me strong -
Not every pain hurts
Deep inside
When you learn to devide
Don´t fear the danger
Follow your heart to the light
Live your dream and breath......


_________________



Nem Toda Dor Machuca
Lacrimosa
(translation to portuguese)

Quando você tem vontade
Você aprende a perdoar e a esquecer
Você tem que -
Recolher os pedaços quebrados e coração humilhado
Levantar-se do lugar aonde você se escondeu
Se eu não soubesse sentir falta de nada
Isso não poderia me machucar nunca mais
Erros ensinam a construir a vida das cinzas que caíram no chão

Sem dor alguma não seria a mesma coisa
Experiências me fizeram forte
Nem toda dor machuca
rofundamente
Quando você aprende a dividir
Não tenha medo do perigo
Siga seu coração para a luz
Viva seus sonhos e respire

Quando você ouve a si mesma
Não espere sempreencontrar compreensão
Isso leva tempo
Você pode perder sua fé
Mas não tenha medo de encontrar a solução

Minha carga não era tão pesada
Que eu não pudesse tentar carregar a sua
Meu coração queimando - insuportável!
Minha mente otimista - desmoronou

Nem dor alguma não seria a mesma coisa
Experiência me fizeram forte
Nem toda dor machuca
Profundamente
Quando você aprende a dividir
Não tenha medo do perigo
Siga seu coração para a luz
Viva seus sonhos e respire..

I have no parents; I make the heaven and earth my mother and father.
I have no home; I make awareness my dwelling.
I have no life and death; I make the tides of breathing my life and death.
I have no divine power; I make honesty my divine power.
I have no means; I make understanding my means.
I have no magic secrets; I make character my magic secret.
I have no body; I make endurance my body.
I have no eyes; I make the flash of lightning my eyes.I have no ears; I make sensibility my ears.I have no limbs; I make promptness my limbs.
I have no strategy; I make “unshadowed by thought” my strategy.
I have no designs; I make “seizing opportunity by the forelock” my design.
I have no miracles; I make right action my miracle.
I have no principles; I make adaptability to all circumstances my principles.
I have no tactics; I make emptiness and fullness my tactics.
I have no talents; I make ready wit my talent.
I have no friends; I make my mind my friend.
I have no enemy; I make carelessness my enemy.
I have no armour; I make benevolence and righteousness my armour.
I have no castle; I make immovable mind my castle.
I have no sword; I make absence of self my sword.


I have no parents; I make the Heavens and the Earth my parents.
I have no home; I make the Tan T'ien my home.
I have no divine power; I make honesty my Divine Power.
I have no means; I make Docility my means.
I have no magic power; I make personality my Magic Power.
I have neither life nor death; I make A Um my Life and Death.
I have no body; I make Stoicism my Body.
I have no eyes; I make The Flash of Lightning my eyes.
I have no ears; I make Sensibility my Ears.
I have no limbs; I make Promptitude my Limbs.
I have no laws; I make Self-Protection my Laws.
I have no strategy; I make the Right to Kill and the Right to Restore Life my Strategy.
I have no designs; I make Seizing the Opportunity by the Forelock my Designs.
I have no miracles; I make Righteous Laws my Miracle.
I have no principles; I make Adaptability to all circumstances my Principle.
I have no tactics; I make Emptiness and Fullness my Tactics.
I have no talent; I make Ready Wit my Talent.
I have no friends; I make my Mind my Friend.
I have no enemy; I make Incautiousness my Enemy.
I have no armour; I make Benevolence my Armour.
I have no castle; I make Immovable Mind my Castle.
I have no sword; I make No Mind my Sword.


Bushido (The Way of the Warrior) - The Samurai Creed

MERRY XMAS!!

Sweet Dreams

Sweet dreams are made of these
Who am i to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
everybody's looking for something
some of them want to use you
some of the them wanna get used by you
some of them want to abuse you
some of them want to be abused

Sweet dreams are made of these
Who am i to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
everybody's looking for something
some of them want to use you
some of them wanna get used by you
some of them want to abuse you
some of them want to be abused

I wanna use you
and abuse you
i wanna know whats inside

Movin on
Movin on
Movin on
Movin on
Movin on
Movin on
MOVIN ON!!!

Sweet dreams are made of these
Who am i to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
everybody's looking for something
some of them want to use you
some of the them wanna get used by you
some of them want to abuse you
some of them want to be abused
I'm gonna use you
and abuse you
i've gotta know whats inside
I'm gonna use you
and abuse you
i've gotta know whats inside


and..try to hear this song with Marilyn Manson..kool!

Who Wants To Live Forever
Queen
Words and music by Brian May

There’s no time for us
There’s no place for us
What is this thing that builds our dreams yet slips away
From us

Who wants to live forever?
Who wants to live forever....?

There’s no chance for us
It’s all decided for us
This world has only one sweet moment set aside for us

Who wants to live forever?
Who wants to live forever?

Who dares to love forever
When love must die.........?

But touch my tears with your lips
Touch my world with your fingertips
And we can have forever
And we can love forever
Forever is our today

Who wants to live forever?
Who wants to live forever?
Forever is our today

Who waits forever anyway?........



click here to listen - > who wants to live forever
http://radio.terra.com.br/includes/internas_albuns/1/1001.html

silence...
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silence ur words..
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silence ur feelings..
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silence ur thoughts..
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silence ur dreams..
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and silence forever...
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all ur mistakes..
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all ur proud...
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all ur vanity..
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and all ur expectations..
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freedom has a price..but why be free and be alone?
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u cant fight against everything..
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u cant force people to acept u..
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u cant know everything in advance to prevent ur mistakes..
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but maybe someday u will silence..
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ur necessity of..
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to be loved.
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...Imagine...

every time we talk abt John Lennon

someone remember this song

what express a dream

to live in a better world..

for me its a perfect song

which we can sing in anytime..

dont u agree??

btw..i'd prefer that we wouldnt need to sing that anymore...

but the world will never be perfect ..
as a dreamer's wish...

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say, I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope some day you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say, I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope some day you'll join us
And the world will be as one...

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http://radio.terra.com.br/busca/musicas.php?musica=IMAGINE

CLICK ABOVE TO HEAR THE SONG..AND THERE..CLICK ON THE 2ND OPTION:

MUSIC OF THE MILLENIUM

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NEW YORK (AFP) - Hundreds gathered in Central Park's Strawberry Fields to take part in worldwide tributes to rock legend John Lennon on the 25th anniversary of his murder by a deranged fan.

Lennon followers laid wreaths outside the New York apartment block where the musician was shot dead on December 8, 1980.
His widow, Yoko Ono, emerged from the Dakota building to lay white roses on the "Imagine" mosaic that is the centrepiece of Central Park's Strawberry Fields tribute to the singer.
Hundreds of people watched Ono as a man played Beatles music on an acoustic guitar for the silent crowds.
People continued to line up to see the mosaic late into the night, braving freezing temperatures and singing songs by candlelight.

obs: the Dakota building is the same where Roman Polanski did the movie Rosemary's Baby..His wife was murdered in that time by Charles Manson (i guess that his name is right) ..who wrote in the wall "PIGS" with Roman's wife blood.

In the English city of Liverpool, where Lennon was born 65 years ago, more than 1,000 messages to the ex-Beatle, including emails from across the globe, were released on white balloons from the city's Albert Dock.
"I just wrote 'Merry Christmas John' on my balloon," said nine-year-old English fan James Andrews, one of the youngest fans present.
"I love The Beatles and especially John Lennon. My Mum and Dad let me take the day off school to come here," he said.
A short service was held at Lennon's statue in the city, near the Cavern Club where The Beatles, Lennon's former group, played some of their earliest concerts. A memorial service was also held at a Liverpool church.
At the Cavern bar in Buenos Aires, some 30 Lennon imitators sang Beatle songs to mark the anniversary.
Japan marked the anniversary with special radio broadcasts and a free concert at a museum in the Tokyo suburb of Saitama that was built with Ono's blessing.
In Cuba, a concert is scheduled for Sunday at a Havana park where President
Fidel Castro inaugurated a life-size bronze monument of Lennon five years ago.

But New York, Lennon's adopted home, was the focus of the commemorations.
The US Sirius Satellite Radio network hosted a four-hour "Lennon Live" tribute featuring performances from New York and London by rock and pop stars Dave Matthews, Paul Weller, Dr. John, Daryl Hall, Stereo MC's and Lulu.

A steady stream of fans started going to the Dakota building early in the day.
Fans were to hold a candlelight vigil in Strawberry Fields from 10:50 pm (0350 GMT Friday), the time when Lennon was shot by Mark Chapman.
Chapman had asked for Lennon's autograph hours before. "Mr. Lennon!" he shouted before aiming a handgun and firing five bullets at the rock world's preacher for peace.
Fans were angry that the New York authorities would not extend the normal 1:00 am curfew in the park so the vigil could go on through the night.

Lennon's widow was one of four people honoured at the annual dinner of the New York chapter of the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences on the eve of the anniversary.
"This week has been hard. Depressing," said Ono, 72. "Now I'm smiling. I'm here. I see all your faces. John would have been so happy that you acknowledged his achievements. This means so much to us. It would have made him happy that you acknowledged our partnership."
A quarter century after Lennon's death, his family, friends and fans are still struggling for control of his legacy.

The anniversary has been marked by exhibitions, memoirs, album re-issues, documentaries and even a Broadway musical and a looming film.
Ono remains the gatekeeper of the Lennon legacy and chief protector of his posthumous image.
In the run-up to the anniversary, other voices have sought to offer a differing view of Lennon, however.
In her memoir "John," published in October, Lennon's first wife, Cynthia Lennon, wrote of the "pain, torment and humiliation" she suffered in her marriage.
And in a statement for the 25th anniversary, Lennon's son, Julian, admitted to "very mixed feelings" about his father.
"He was the father I loved who let me down in so many ways," he said.

Meanwhile, Chapman is serving a 20 years to life prison sentence. His parole appeals have been turned down three times.
In an interview recorded more than 10 years ago, Chapman described how he could not stop himself shooting Lennon. "It was like a train, a runaway train, there was no stopping it. No matter -- nothing could have stopped me," he said.

...so...

so..the year is finishing..more tecnology..still corruption..disaters..new bands..but nothing like before..pearl jam just sang to 150.000 people in brazil..sun is getting cold..misery..new diseases..or the not really old ones still killing..football..games..that son of a bitch who stole ur place at ur job..pornography with children..murders..new movies..the world is the same..and so is the human beeing...

and people still do small groups to feel better or wotever.............

they dont know..or they are pretending that they dont know..that everything is related......and it was said in 1855, by Chief Seattle when the President of US - Franklin Pierce - wanted to buy the land of the indians...

but..

the family of that Chief is dead...and people like that president is still alive....

we will be like einstein said " i dont know how will be the 3rd war..but i know how will be the 4th...with sticks and stones........."

and people are still so cowards..in the minimun details...and..theres something worst than a coward??

cowards just pretending but they are never anything....they are just on ur way to confuse..to hurt...to spoil...........thas y they could be in other place..but not here ..on earth

btw..im not a jugde..and im wondering if someday im gonna wake up and notice that im not a dreamer anymore....

well..according with and astrologer..im gonna die next year..when an awful position among saturm-neptun-uran and plutan will be on my astrological sky...who knows..

god knows...

..im coming back..:P

suuuuureeeeeeeeee!! im coming baaaack!!
but the change is not complete yet :D
..well..we are always in changing..

i arrived on saturday morning, after be at the hospital for 2 days..
and 4 hours of surgery..
and u know wot??
i was happy there :D..
well..i can be happy anywhere...

my recuperation is really fast..
all my friends are praying for me..
and im really happy also cause this..
when you have problems
you know who r your true friends...
and from the midlle of year to the end..
it was so hard to me..but a dreamer is a dreamer..
and he/she will always believe that everything is gonna be allright.....
thas y my friends said that where i am..
nothing can be wrong.. :D

but i dont hav any power...God has....
and when i am down..when i think that im lost
(ya..sometimes i think like that as well!!)..
He brings me many good surprises..

hmmm...im so lucky!! ;)

..count down..november 24!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

well..finally is the day..tomorrow!! :o wow! :o btw..im not afraid really.. im incredible happy and excited!! many things happened this year..and ill be back with a good health again..

thanks a lot to all my paki friends!!
i received a lot of virtual cards wishing me good lucky..dear kook..dear bunny..dear qambi (or bambi?? :D)..dear sheXad..thanks a lot :) i really lov u buddies!!

and my brazilian friends..well..a so good friend..luciana..she is always worried abt me..like a good sis..she understands when i close myself like a shell..because when i do that its not because i dont like my frineds,.,its just time to put some things in order inside or outside of me..

well..im sleepy..but im figthing against it..in a few hours..it will be done...i have to go now..

but..

ill be back :)

c ya later aligator ;)

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..the sun is shining for u....

since august 2004..

well..not just in brazil..i wrote from abroad too :P ..

do whatever you want..but never waste your time..dont lose what is really important to you..and live with your heart in peace......

...monday morning.. :)

well..i never know from where i should start..i mean..the date of the blog..because.. to read from up to down i need to write from the end to the beginning..beggining??..omg..how to write this word now..but the fact is..its so boring to do everything backward..humm..like the bizar world..on superman comics..who do remember that?? ok..no..i was not to talk abt it..forget it..its not the same sense..i just like to play with ideas and words..

so..i went to downtown today..at the beggining..beginning..begginning..the weather was not really clear..but agreable..and i passed through some places that for sure u need to know if u come to my country..well..i know u will prefer to know beaches..but it is not all that we hav ;)

yea..day is starting..but theres not much sun yet..Botafogo Beach..place not for swim but theres the Iate Club and a restaurant Sol & Mar with a view to sugar loaf and to the airplanes what makes the turn next to the stone..Santos Dumont Airport is some kms close and its so small..but our best pilots land in it like eagles ;) ..with boeings...
the big tower is Rio Sul Mall..and the bigs sitones we call Sugar Loaf..i already talk abt this before..you can take a cable car with capacity to 80 people and what just is stopped with winds after 80km/h.

i went to the hospital what i already talked before and from there we can see a big tower..at its top there a revolving restaurant and the Santa Luzia church and the big white watch of the old Mesbla (at the end of the pic - doesnt exist anymore) what still works remind us golden times of past..

at the top..Presidente Antonio Carlos Av. with the Ministeries - Work and Treasure when Rio de Janeiro was the capital of Brazil..

the second pic shows...
Companhia Vale do Rio Doce (CVRD), a diversified mining, cargo transportation, and power generation company - the world's leading iron ore miner, has more than one iron in the fire. Iron ore and pellets (used in steel production) account for about 65% of CVRD's sales; the company, in turn, accounts for 30% of the world's ocean-shipped iron ore. CVRD's mines also produce bauxite, manganese, kaolin, and potash. Other products include steel, ferro-alloys, copper, and aluminum. CVRD has holdings in hydroelectric power generation and in rail and shipping businesses, primarily to support its mining activities. Valepar controls more than 50% of CVRD. The Brazilian government holds the "golden share," giving it veto power on any permanent company changes - see the complete info in this link - and try to get a job here ;) - http://www.hoovers.com/vale-do-rio-doce/--ID__95034--/free-co-factsheet.xhtml?cm_ven=PAID&cm_cat=INK&cm_pla=CO1&cm_ite=vale-do-rio-doce

the third one is Gustavo Capanema Palace..you will find just culture and art companies from state here..

at the last one..Associação Brasileira de Imprensa..ABI - Brazilian Association Press

its not possible to see the National Library..theres so many trees..

but the second is Rio Branco Avenue what complete 100 years this year..

the beautiful and restaured square Cinelância (cine - because there was a lot of cines here at the beggining of the century - means land of the cine)..and the white building at the right is the Council ( conuncillors)

and at the end the Municipal Theatre.. i really lov it!!

hey!! i didnt eat my brfst yet!! :o did u?? :P ..at the Treze de Maio street..besides the Municipal Theatre we can take a so good bkfst with fruits..cakes..pies..candies..many kinds of bread and other delicious things..and juices!!
yyyyyuuuuummyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!........

the building of the Development Bank - BNDES - Banco do Desenvolvimento

BNDES promotes the growth of Micro, Small and Medium Enterprises...

BNDES invests in Brazilian filmmaking and in the restoration of the architectural heritage...

BNDES disbursements reach R$ 42.4 billion until October...

Up to September, BNDES has disbursed US$ 3.3 billion for the exports.
http://www.bndes.gov.br/english/

now..im going to the Carioca square..at the top..the Saint Antony Monastery..

then some views of this part of the city with commercials buildings and a book fair..where you can find old and new books for a low price..this fair is always "walking" through the city..

loooking to the other side of Carioca square theres the 7 Setembro street - September 7 street - a beautiful place to walk and with a lot of shops..

at the Carioca street 2 historycal buildings - A Guitarra de Prata ( The Silver Guitar) and Bar Luiz (german food)

and you can buy in plants and flowers in a small street (no name) there as well..

and..the Real Gabinete Português de Leitura..a small library but with so many rare books..

a silentious and beautiful place to read..

at the top a typical small street in downtown..the most of these streets used to be "dominated" by arabics but now the chinese are there with their sell-everything shops and their food..but i still love arabic food..so delicious :P

Saint Francisco church at the Saint Francisco square

João Caetano Theatre at the Tiradentes square..

Confeitaria Colombo..a so traditional restaurant where all the vintage intelectuals used to be gathered..and how many parties they used to do here!! with so much poetry..romantic..

two commercial buildings "dressed" to xmas..well..downt town is like our country..so many diferences..old/young..poor/rich..modern/traditional..

and.. for sure..a time for a express coffee with a small lemon pie..i loooooooooooooooooooov it!!

coming back to home..sugar loaf again..with a more sun at this time..the weather is really good..but..just cross the tunnel and..its a cloudy day again.. :S

but not for so long..at my neigboorhood the sun is shining..like a god's gift :)

im a sun creature..for sure ;)
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sorry for my english :P
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...december is coming...

well..december is coming....wow!! year passed so fast!! at the stores windows start to show many things related to christmas..like......
trees..decoration....
and at the end of all year we can feel something diferent in the air...they say that is the hope that a new year can be better..or maybe just because everything that is new is really exciting...
last year i was here..writing in this blog...

what happened in your life during this year?
would you change something??
what can you do in the next year that you couldnt in this one?
what are you doing of your life?....

so..the only sure is...time is passing.......

hey skywalker! lets find our answer! maybe we will get it...or not..
but the main is....keep trying to find it out................

for sure that go shopping in a mall is really more pratical..but it really sucks..then..u can walk by my neigboorhood and see the windows..take a coffee in Armazám do Café..what hav many kinds of good coffees from many parts of the world..mainly brazilian coffee.. turkish and arabic.. inside there u can feel a sooo good coffee smell and a small Santa Claus playing a violin..
on the streets.. we start to see the violin players and their hats..they play so good..